guess wad..
i drop my hp on e floor..
e 2nd time..
ahh!!
e 1st time was at simei..
2nd time was whn i was abt to tak a lrt to simei!!damn!!
wad a bad dae i had..
1st..my hp drop on e floor..leavin a big scratch hole..[nt as bad as you image]
2nd..went to simei for nthin..
coz..
thy said..a guest of honor was cumin..
and mr soh said,
we gotta wear shoe..
jus whn i wore slippers 4 e 1st time therr..-_-"
thn i was lky..okkaye..
go find shoe..
-_-but SERIOUSLY..
hu wld lent US shoes..?
epsecially students..?do you think thy will..
US[lisa n myself]
whn we headed to e toilet to get changed..
i saw e burger buster auntie..
thn i was lky..
told lisa to ask her..
-_-in e end, i was e one askin~
thn she lent lisa a pair of shoe..
we walked to e carpark area of simei..
i sat dwn..
listenin to wad lisa n joshep said..
...
[my mind was thinkin]
lisa why are you worriied ferr..
coz lisa was blahin..
sayin if e teacher dun accept her shoe she will go off straight..
you noe wad, lisa?!
you think too much..
at tat point i wanted to tell you..
missyy giirl..
you are wearin a pair of shoe..
a so-called wrap up shoe..
why are you so worriied ferr..
hahas...
over-reactin again..
if she said those befor she gt e shoe..
tats a diff matter..which actually,
she did..
ahahs..

yesterdae..
all i did was..
said wad i felt..
and thn kept quiet..
and listen to thm e entire time..

if nt wad am i suppose to do?
i dun hv a pair of shoes..
and you wan us to wear shoes fer good impression fer e guest-of honor
whichh i noe..its a good thing
and
you dont dare to tell us tat we wldnt b able to step out ther wifout it.
so i jus hlped you..clear ur mind..
as in..
...[hw do i explain it]
i noe you dont wan to let us b seem lky tis..
partly coz you will feel ...
but at e same time you wldnt dare to tell us..
but you dont expect me to stay ther fer 3hours plus jus fer you..
e time i stayed ther..
was long enuff fer me to show you i respect you!
so i was jus hlpin you to get tis off your chest..
by leavin off..

i got so much mixed feelings..
lky..
actually i dont feel anithin whn you told me tat we gota wear shoe..
but e min,
i saw ur face..
showin me..us tat you REALLY wan us to quickly change to shoes..
afraid tat we wld
..embrass you
i was lky..
plain white..
nothin to sae..
and neither did i told e others..
[im ver sensitive..
cld tell a person hw thy felt or think..
by jus a slight move..]
[[face move..
finger move..]]
(everybodii wld noe..
iif you observe)
thn i was still tryin to joke ard..
sayiin "hey..lets tak e runners shoe n RUN"
and
"hey lets rent shoes"
holdin back..wad i felt..
afraid i was over reactin..

thn we cldnt find ani shoe..
so i thought..
in a simple way,
why nt i go back home..
dun wanna trouble thm..
feelin bad..
YET, alittle piss off!
thn mr lam walked to me..
and said..
"im so disappointed wif you.."
my face started turnin red..
but still keepin eye contact
"you jus gotta wear slippers on e last event."
my voice started droppin n changed..
i was lky abt to cry anitime..

[but i didnt]
i felt as if i let thm dwn..
but i jus smiled..
and walked off..
took my stuff frm lisa alrdy..
i headed back..
i walked to e carpark inner area wif joshup..
walkin infront...as my face was red
quickly rub my face..as josh was tokin to me..
smiledd..and hear wad he was tryin to tell me..
e whole journey..
i was
guilty...
upset..
piss off..
etc..

met up wif chinhui at lot1..
thn followed by annie..
went over to chinhui's hse..
shared money to buy vampire comics bk 5 n 6..
hahas..
my mood started liftin up..

[[finallyy**]]
fer e 1st time..
i mit chinhui's nephew..
arghh!!cute!!
annie n myself tok to chinhui's mum..
which you noe..
chinhui ignorin us AGAIN..
ahahs..
readin e comics..
hahas..
i was lky ..
WOW..
eye openin up e maximum..
lookin at annie..
she can b a grt mom..
she noe hw to carry e baby..
pad her..
play wif her..

hahas..
after~
headed to chinhui's room..
read comics..
tok tok tok..
whahas..
thn..
lisa called..
lettin me recall..
she told me tat mr soh was feelin sad..guilty.. ~
thn after tat she said nt realli guilty larr..
nt sad but nt happi.. ~
-_-lisa..
you reallie dun noe hw to cheer someone up huh..
ahahs..
i noe..you are tryin to tell me nt to b angry wif mr soh..
at e same time..
you thought i wld b mistaken..

right..?!hahas..funniie giirl!
missy..
i dont really bother at all..
i jus dont wanna bother AT ALL..
...


okkaye..
tiis is e 4th dae..
myy eye has bm twistin since..
my right eye is lky..
twistin all e way..
haiz..


michellerachel..
some times i wonderr..
why am i me?
hw i wish i cld fly to somewher else..
wher noone knoes me..
no..wher im transparent..
wher i cldnt hear wad others sae..
nor think..
nor do i hv to see their faces..
nor bother wad thy think..
or care..
all tat it is..is i hear nature..
i feel e wind..i hear e wind..
i feel e cool windy breeze..
but feel hot/warm n save inside
read minds?
able to know..?
hw i wish i cant
nor do i wan to..
i hate it..!!
i dislky it..
i hate bein lookdwn..
i hate bein dissappointed..
i hate dissappointtin ppl..
im afriad of trustin..
im afriad bein trust..

*'.. [- ... hopes ... -] ..'*
Aniway..
i jus hope..
whn we mit..
im able to tok to you normally..
lky beforr...





dissappointed..
tat someone didnt trust me..

afraid..
to know..

upset..
tat you lied.

piss off..
unwillingly..

teared..
unknowingly...

smiled..
naturely..

nudeness..
purposely~

i hv overcome so much..
frm primary sch till since..
friendship bn played fer..
not bn trusted..
nt bein cared for..
until nw..
and frm so on..i will alwayys rmbr it for eternity!
a girl..or two
seem pure n simple..
a girl named baoping..angie
another, celince
she/they lied to me..
fool me..
after bein fooled by her once..
i gave her another chance..
and myself a chance..
but i was trick again..
...she told everybody i played her..
-_-how can tat b true?
i always treasure her as a
"best friien"
but wad did i get..in return
accussed of..
if i realli did somethin she had mistaken..
i reallii apologise..
but wad can b compared to hers..?!
if i mit her/thm..
i forgive thm..

wiif life cums friiends'!!!
but im so bless to mit better friiends..
chinhui
annie
meifang
yokeleng
juwita
zila
etc!
fang
saranya
lisa
jaime
etc!
my pri sch frien are nt all bad..
kind of think of it..
onlii friends no longer in my class..[p5/6]
are thm..

guess wad..
i drop my hp on e floor..
e 2nd time..
ahh!!
e 1st time was at simei..
2nd time was whn i was abt to tak a lrt to simei!!damn!!
wad a bad dae i had..
1st..my hp drop on e floor..leavin a big scratch hole..[nt as bad as you image]
2nd..went to simei for nthin..
coz..
thy said..a guest of honor was cumin..
and mr soh said,
we gotta wear shoe..
jus whn i wore slippers 4 e 1st time therr..-_-"
thn i was lky..okkaye..
go find shoe..
-_-but SERIOUSLY..
hu wld lent US shoes..?
epsecially students..?do you think thy will..
US[lisa n myself]
whn we headed to e toilet to get changed..
i saw e burger buster auntie..
thn i was lky..
told lisa to ask her..
-_-in e end, i was e one askin~
thn she lent lisa a pair of shoe..
we walked to e carpark area of simei..
i sat dwn..
listenin to wad lisa n joshep said..
...
[my mind was thinkin]
lisa why are you worriied ferr..
coz lisa was blahin..
sayin if e teacher dun accept her shoe she will go off straight..
you noe wad, lisa?!
you think too much..
at tat point i wanted to tell you..
missyy giirl..
you are wearin a pair of shoe..
a so-called wrap up shoe..
why are you so worriied ferr..
hahas...
over-reactin again..
if she said those befor she gt e shoe..
tats a diff matter..which actually,
she did..
ahahs..

yesterdae..
all i did was..
said wad i felt..
and thn kept quiet..
and listen to thm e entire time..

if nt wad am i suppose to do?
i dun hv a pair of shoes..
and you wan us to wear shoes fer good impression fer e guest-of honor
whichh i noe..its a good thing
and
you dont dare to tell us tat we wldnt b able to step out ther wifout it.
so i jus hlped you..clear ur mind..
as in..
...[hw do i explain it]
i noe you dont wan to let us b seem lky tis..
partly coz you will feel ...
but at e same time you wldnt dare to tell us..
but you dont expect me to stay ther fer 3hours plus jus fer you..
e time i stayed ther..
was long enuff fer me to show you i respect you!
so i was jus hlpin you to get tis off your chest..
by leavin off..

i got so much mixed feelings..
lky..
actually i dont feel anithin whn you told me tat we gota wear shoe..
but e min,
i saw ur face..
showin me..us tat you REALLY wan us to quickly change to shoes..
afraid tat we wld
..embrass you
i was lky..
plain white..
nothin to sae..
and neither did i told e others..
[im ver sensitive..
cld tell a person hw thy felt or think..
by jus a slight move..]
[[face move..
finger move..]]
(everybodii wld noe..
iif you observe)
thn i was still tryin to joke ard..
sayiin "hey..lets tak e runners shoe n RUN"
and
"hey lets rent shoes"
holdin back..wad i felt..
afraid i was over reactin..

thn we cldnt find ani shoe..
so i thought..
in a simple way,
why nt i go back home..
dun wanna trouble thm..
feelin bad..
YET, alittle piss off!
thn mr lam walked to me..
and said..
"im so disappointed wif you.."
my face started turnin red..
but still keepin eye contact
"you jus gotta wear slippers on e last event."
my voice started droppin n changed..
i was lky abt to cry anitime..

[but i didnt]
i felt as if i let thm dwn..
but i jus smiled..
and walked off..
took my stuff frm lisa alrdy..
i headed back..
i walked to e carpark inner area wif joshup..
walkin infront...as my face was red
quickly rub my face..as josh was tokin to me..
smiledd..and hear wad he was tryin to tell me..
e whole journey..
i was
guilty...
upset..
piss off..
etc..

met up wif chinhui at lot1..
thn followed by annie..
went over to chinhui's hse..
shared money to buy vampire comics bk 5 n 6..
hahas..
my mood started liftin up..

[[finallyy**]]
fer e 1st time..
i mit chinhui's nephew..
arghh!!cute!!
annie n myself tok to chinhui's mum..
which you noe..
chinhui ignorin us AGAIN..
ahahs..
readin e comics..
hahas..
i was lky ..
WOW..
eye openin up e maximum..
lookin at annie..
she can b a grt mom..
she noe hw to carry e baby..
pad her..
play wif her..

hahas..
after~
headed to chinhui's room..
read comics..
tok tok tok..
whahas..
thn..
lisa called..
lettin me recall..
she told me tat mr soh was feelin sad..guilty.. ~
thn after tat she said nt realli guilty larr..
nt sad but nt happi.. ~
-_-lisa..
you reallie dun noe hw to cheer someone up huh..
ahahs..
i noe..you are tryin to tell me nt to b angry wif mr soh..
at e same time..
you thought i wld b mistaken..

right..?!hahas..funniie giirl!
missy..
i dont really bother at all..
i jus dont wanna bother AT ALL..
...


okkaye..
tiis is e 4th dae..
myy eye has bm twistin since..
my right eye is lky..
twistin all e way..
haiz..


michellerachel..
some times i wonderr..
why am i me?
hw i wish i cld fly to somewher else..
wher noone knoes me..
no..wher im transparent..
wher i cldnt hear wad others sae..
nor think..
nor do i hv to see their faces..
nor bother wad thy think..
or care..
all tat it is..is i hear nature..
i feel e wind..i hear e wind..
i feel e cool windy breeze..
but feel hot/warm n save inside
read minds?
able to know..?
hw i wish i cant
nor do i wan to..
i hate it..!!
i dislky it..
i hate bein lookdwn..
i hate bein dissappointed..
i hate dissappointtin ppl..
im afriad of trustin..
im afriad bein trust..

*'.. [- ... hopes ... -] ..'*
Aniway..
i jus hope..
whn we mit..
im able to tok to you normally..
lky beforr...





dissappointed..
tat someone didnt trust me..

afraid..
to know..

upset..
tat you lied.

piss off..
unwillingly..

teared..
unknowingly...

smiled..
naturely..

nudeness..
purposely~

i hv overcome so much..
frm primary sch till since..
friendship bn played fer..
not bn trusted..
nt bein cared for..
until nw..
and frm so on..i will alwayys rmbr it for eternity!
a girl..or two
seem pure n simple..
a girl named baoping..angie
another, celince
she/they lied to me..
fool me..
after bein fooled by her once..
i gave her another chance..
and myself a chance..
but i was trick again..
...she told everybody i played her..
-_-how can tat b true?
i always treasure her as a
"best friien"
but wad did i get..in return
accussed of..
if i realli did somethin she had mistaken..
i reallii apologise..
but wad can b compared to hers..?!
if i mit her/thm..
i forgive thm..

wiif life cums friiends'!!!
but im so bless to mit better friiends..
chinhui
annie
meifang
yokeleng
juwita
zila
etc!
fang
saranya
lisa
jaime
etc!
my pri sch frien are nt all bad..
kind of think of it..
onlii friends no longer in my class..[p5/6]
are thm..